#494 - Cyndi Lauper - She's So Unusual

The initial six tracks of Cyndi Lauper’s She’s So Unusual are lessons in how pop music should be made and played. These songs, more particularly “Time After Time,” are so brilliant in their composition and songwriting (er, at least, sometimes). These first six songs are so catchy that you forget you are listening to an album so engrossed in the 80’s. That is until you get to track #7 “Witness.” Beginning with this song, the album begins its slow descent into who the hell cares. The remainder of the album just falls apart, but then outdoes itself in its ridiculousness with “He’s So Unusual;” a song that appears to be a reaction to some similar song from 1929. Regardless, what these songs do for She’s So Unusual, other than bring home the fact that “Yes, Cyndi, you are unusual, we get it,” is push it to fall victim to a number of other 80’s albums with a handful of good songs and a remainder of uninspired wackiness. This album was huge in the 80’s. Lauper was an icon for any number of teenagers with a need to act out against their fathers. She was the poster child for rebellion for girls who otherwise would have been home avidly watching The Facts of Life while wishing to be Blair. I realize this album was big. Huge. But I have a hard time understanding why outside of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” (which as a male I find myself utterly annoyed by every time I hear it) and “Time After Time” (which has been covered by everyone from Mariah Carey to The Academy Is… to The Boomtang Boys (love your Fubu jersey ya loser.) Other songs that stand up well for themselves are “All Through the Night,” (although I could do without the annoying keyboard responsible dream sequence riff) “When You Were Mine,” (rumored to have been written by Prince which would explain why Lauper appears to be singing to a woman or maybe it doesn’t) and “Money Changes Everything” (which is great solely because of sections 2:37 and 3:12 from this video). You show that microphone Cyndi and who could take themselves serious as an artist while playing that thing?

All in all, this album has a multitude of hits that have appeared to remain popular and timeless, but for all those hits Lauper lets us down with the misses that make up the album’s conclusion. Cyndi, we adore you for your creative, your refusal to fit the mold, your inclusion of Capt. Lou Albano in your videos, your contribution to the world with “Time After Time,” and your goat warble inflections which I truly believe Chris Daughtry has been trying to steal if only he could reach those octaves, but I cannot forgive you for songs 7-10, especially that bullshit “He’s So Unusual.”

-d.

As a child I had what I would later determine to be a crush on Cyndi Lauper. Go ahead and laugh. Now go watch Vibes and tell me those legs aren’t freaking amazing . An unparalleled performer, Cyndi is a machine onstage, flying from side to side she’s the metaphorical whirling dervish. Throw in one of the biggest voices in pop music history and what do you have to lose?

So there’s not much to complain about here. The classic "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" is actually thoroughly underrated for the great musicianship subtly laid in the groove. The guitar picks a reggae melody, mimicking the bassline like a hyperactive child. In a brilliant production move, it’s panned all the way to the left, while a keyboard bubbles on the right. It wraps the music around your head, adding to the songs infinite catchiness. A perfect example of great song structure that people should still be learning from today.

Since I’m on the subject of classics, "Time After Time" is really the number that will be remembered in another fifty years. The lyrics are some of the best from the period, and the deceptively simple arrangement just adds to the grace of one of pops great ballads. Less famous but hilariously more infamous is the great ode to masturbation, "She Bop." Previous to The Divinyls, ‘they say I better get a chaperone / because I can’t stop messing with the danger zone’ was by far the most graphic thing my young ears had heard on record. If only Cyndi knew what she was doing to the youth of the world….

The rest is an assortment of nice dance numbers and a few forgettable wrecks. "All Through the Night" features a great bass groove and some really pretty vocal work. Cyndi had that ability to go from singing like a Vienna choirboy to hollering on cue. Unlike most singers she never struggled to control the limit of her range, often running right to the edge of cracking and holding there. At times her naiveté shows through though, like on the typical 80’s attempt at reggae, "Witness." For the most part it’s a solid addition, but listening to her attempt to imitate a dub echo with her voice is pretty laughable.

The last two tracks are the only downfall here. "I’ll Kiss You" might as well have been the b-side to "She Blinded Me With Science," it sounds so much like Thomas Dolby just crapped out a sweet keyboard solo and figured he’d throw a song around it. So we end with "He’s So Unusual." OK, we get it, you can sing like Betty Boop. Now please stop! Right as you figure it’s just a joke thrown on at the end, a song breaks out. I wish it hadn’t. The deadpan call and response backed by Cyndi saying seemingly random things in that Betty voice just…. well, I really can’t describe how bad it is. Wait til the sax player holds a note for about 12 seconds as the beginning of a solo. That pretty much caps it.

So we have a great album with two pointless tracks that leave a bad taste in your mouth. It’s like eating an incredible meal, steak tartare and duck l’orange, then eating a McFlurry for dessert. Definitely deserving of a higher place on the list, She’s So Unusual could only have been better if "True Colours" had been written a few years sooner instead of being on her next record. By the way, this is the second review in which I’ve made a Thomas Dolby reference. Bizarre….

-The Fat Man

#495 - Husker Du - New Day Rising

Ah, to be embraced by Greg Norton’s facial hair. The band recognizable to anyone due to their bassist’s moustache has come right when I needed them. Husker Du sits in the top few hardcore bands of all time, surpassed only by Dead Kennedy’s and maybe Bad Brains or Black Flag. Sure they went a bit softer in the end, but never turned into glam pop like my 90’s Bay area heroes AFI (damn you Davey Havock!).

How so much melody can fit amongst the grinding guitars and bellowed vocals is shocking. For all my love of Nirvana, this is what they were aiming for and almost reached. Not many bands can pull off this level of rage and dissatisfaction while keeping the layered background vocals, which makes it even more impressive when they break into heavier territory like the chorus to "I Don’t Know What You’re Talking About." The album first picks up with "Girl Who Lives On Heaven Hill," which they play like they’ve been possessed by The Stooges. If you told me this was originally from Raw Power I’d have to believe you. Perfectly overdriven guitars crash into a bouncing bassline. Wonderful!

"I Apologize" is practically a road map to 90’s punk rock. Nothing to say you’re sorry for here, though. The next few songs make me long for bands like Burning Airlines and Jawbreaker. Clearly, many of the bands I grew up with listened to New Day Rising and heard their own futures in it. Things kind of stumble on "Perfect Example" with the mumbled words going well into the realm of incomprehension. This is one place where Nirvana passed their teachers. No one could mumble like Kurt.

"Terms of Psychic Warfare" punches right through with one of the poppiest and catchiest melodies you’ll hear on any hardcore records. Good luck getting it out of your head. It’s one of the great things about Husker Du that they were never the least bit afraid to play a song the way they wanted, regardless of the supposed conventions of their genre. "Watcha Drinkin" could play alongside a Descendants album while "Books About UFOs" could be from the Replacements. True versatility removes the fear of experimenting. It also says a lot that this record was recorded at the same time as Zen Arcade, arguably an even more influential collection.

If you grew up with the alternative rock of the early 90’s you owe it to yourself to hear where your favorite bands got their inspiration. If you are just a fan of good music, check this out and realize how far ahead of its time New Day Rising was. We’re talking early ’85, and no one lived up to the potential shown here til Nirvana blew up in five years later. Bands are still showing a distinct debt to Husker Du today. My favorite album on the list so far, barely topping Tres Hombres.
-The Fat Man

Rise Against's 2006 The Sufferer & the Witness begins with song titled "Chamber the Cartridge" where a man succinctly informs the listener, "This is noise." Upon hearing the opening track of Husker Du's New Day Rising, I think most would agree that the aforementioned statement would be better suited at the beginning of this album. I agree wholeheartedly with Mike's critique that Husker Du were far ahead of their time. Just listening to this album you can imagine what all the grunge bands out of Seattle had been listening to in the garages with their friends. Picture Krist Novoselic arriving at Cobain's house with a recorded cassette of Husker Du and exclaiming, "Dude, you have to hear this." The rest would become rock history, if this imagined scenario did, in fact, happen.

I would agree that some of these tracks are incredibly catchy, despite their glaringly obvious alienation from radio rock. My particular favorites are that of "Celebrated Summer," "Terms of Psychic Warfare," and "Books about UFOs." Close seconds come in the form of "Girl Who Lives on Heaven Hill" and "I Apologize." Pick any one of these songs and try to argue they did not have any sort of impact on the grunge uprising of the early 90's or the subsequent rise of pop-punk. Try to argue it and I'll merely scoff at you. Seriously. Pshaw.

One thing I find incredibly pleasing about this album is the intelligence of they lyrics however sparse they may be. For example, Mould's line at the conclusion of "Terms of Psychic Warfare" where he sings, "And don't feel bad the next time my memory comes creepin', You've got your own bed now I suggest that's the one you sleep in." My idol Jesse Lacey couldn't have said it better. Pure post-breakup genius. Unfortunately, some of the genius of Mould's lyrics get lost within the mumble. Said mumble was perfected by Cobain and we thank him for that. Mould's mumble got to be a bit irritating especially on "59 Times the Pain;" a song I thought would have been much better had Eddie Vedder lent his trademark warble to it.

I enjoyed the album for the most part. It's always cool to hear albums that paved the way for other artists, especially when those artists are Nirvana, Pearl Jam, etc. I disagree with Mike though when he says that Nirvana fell short to Mould's expertise. I think Cobain did it far better and far angrier, but I appreciate Husker Du's foundation. This album is legit....and so is Greg Norton.

#496 Kiss - Destroyer

Mike hates Kiss. So, expect his review to be laced with hate crimes and obscenities. In all honesty, I could care less about Kiss. I don’t love them, but I’ve never hated them. My only feelings toward the 70’s megastars is and always been simply this, “What was the big deal?” I can attribute part of that attitude toward my youth (born in 1983) and my removal from the culture of the Kiss era, but after listening to Destroyer a fair amount of times my feelings remain the same. “What was the big deal?”

Destroyer starts out with an attempt at creating a image of what the album has in store by giving us an inordinate amount of noise that is supposed to be engines revving leading us into “Detroit Rock City.” Each time this played, I skipped over it until I heard music playing. I found it extremely annoying and distracted and I’m usually all for experimentation and noise. We get it guys. Your song referencing Detroit and a vast amount of cars are made, or used to be made, there. I could deal without the drag strip racing noise fiasco.

Aside from that, I found this album to be mediocre. I can only explain its popularity by the fact that Kiss found an ingenious way to market themselves and their make-up. Look up any article you can find on Kiss and they all mention two things; Kiss were great at marketing their image and they had one hell of a stage show. Does this mean that Lady Gaga will eventually make her way onto a future “Greatest Albums of All Time” list? No disrespect to Gaga, I respect her for her theatricality and find her songs catchy as hell (no doubt Mike will have his own thoughts after reading that comment), but her inclusion on this type of list is hard to consider. I feel the same way about Kiss. Maybe their stage show was great. I could see myself in the 70’s driving around in a Dodge Dart belting some of these tunes out with my friends in the same fashion that we sometimes yelled out Bon Jovi songs. Not for our critical regard towards Bon Jovi, but instead the sing-a-long-ness they provide for a group of teens afflicted with undiagnosed ADHD. Hell, I might have even been down with the face painting factor, though this I highly doubt due to the fact that I could care less about Hollywood Undead (another face disguising band that Mike and I agree parents don’t understand therefore driving their rebellious teens to listen).

My main dilemma with this album is that I find all the songs between “Detroit Rock City” and “Shout It Our Loud” to be kitschy and lame. The main case for this claim is the hardly raunchy “Great Expectations” with its timeless (read that as sarcasm) lyric, “You watch me singing this song / You see what my mouth can do / And you wish you were the one I was doing it to.” I have no problem with the raunch-factor, but I feel other bands have done it much better. As I said before, most of the songs were a let-down until “Shout It Out Loud” and “Beth,” of which the latter is just a ballad that led the way for the Monster Ballad mania of the 1980’s. The album was listenable, but I feel that Kiss’ ability to put on one hell of a stage show has led them to be regarded as a great rock and roll band while, in my opinion, this is not the case. It has happened before and continues to happens in cases of bands far worse, but it never fails to cause irritation. Just an okay album, but not worthy of inclusion.

-d.

……Oh I’m sorry, Kiss. Did you start the song finally? I thought maybe those first few minutes of quiet engines were your idea of music. It sure tops some of what else is here. Now very quickly I do find a huge positive. Gene’s bass playing is actually very precise and clean, something a lot of 70’s bands really lacked. He’s no John Deacon or Chris Squire, but he plays some mildly prog-y licks on Detroit Rock city and really keeps the song moving. Which is very important, because the lyrics here dredge the depths of schlocky “I’m so tough” hair metal stereotypes.

King of the Nighttime World would have been huge if it had been recorded by Great White in ’88. But it wasn’t, and Great White sucked anyways. After three listening, I still haven’t actually caught a verse here because the chorus is stuck in my head. It’s not catchy. It’s just repeated (and repeated and repeated and repeated and repeated and repeated) til you can no longer fathom that there was any other part to the song. Next up you have what I can only imagine was a huge influence on Spinal Tap, God of Thunder. Please, guys, I’m not sure what’s involved with ‘robbing me of my virgin soul’, but I think the first few tracks already accomplished the goal.

Oh but here comes Great Expectations! Who thought it was a good idea for Kiss to attempt to sound like David Bowie gone pop? The most vocally challenging song on the album and it’s handed to the worst singer in the band. Just hit skip. Flaming Youth. Yeah, just go ahead and hit skip again. Sweet Pain? I’ll take ‘potential titles for this review’, Alex.

Shout It Loud, isn’t half bad. By far my favorite song from Kiss. Sounding like a cross between Meatloaf and The Who (that sounds like an horrible idea in writing, but it works somehow), there’s a nice balance between aggression and melody. Actually a pretty fun foot stomper, so far 1 for 7. Then Beth happens. I keep going back and forth on this one. The orchestration is very nice, at times downright beautiful. But I can’t help thinking this should have been a Rod Stewart song. I effing hate Rod Stewart. While the lyrics lack any subtlety or depth, considering this is Kiss, it’s practically worthy of an Ivor Novello award (look it up, heathens).

Finally we come to Do You Love Me, a song so brash as to ask “do you love my seven inch…… leather heels”. Ew. And no. As a matter of fact let me answer the entire song with a very emphatic negative. I don’t expect every band to have the gentle touch and smooth way with words of say, early Queen, or later day Pink Floyd. But for Satan’s sake, Kiss, buy a thesaurus! It’s called innuendo, look it up. Billy Holliday asked for a hotdog for her bun, and I’m guessing she wasn’t hungry. So much is wrong here, so much is bad. Please let there be no more Kiss on this list……..

-the Fat Man

#497 - Public Enemy - Yo! Bum Rush the Show

Yo! Bum Rush the Show debuted in 1987 and propelled Chuck D., Flava Flav, and the rest of Public Enemy to hip-hop glory. Twenty-three years later, the albums influence on the path rap and hip-hop would take remains evident, but something has been lost in translation over the years. Yo! Bum Rush the Show, like most of its fellow late 80’s and early 90’s hip-hop brethren, likens itself to Mickey Rourke’s face in that it has not aged well at all. What was, at that point in 1987, a lyrical overload hammering a political and social message has become an album full of ho-hum rhymes and Flava Flav doing what he does best…spitting nonsense.

The aspects of this album that are still as good as they were so long ago are the creative beats and wonderful samples courtesy of The Bomb Squad. I especially love the sample during the breakdown in “Miuzi Weighs a Ton.” Also, Chuck D’s aggression and intensity behind his rhymes are something to be praised for the music it would later inspire. It’s hard to imagine the anger in any rapper from Eminem to Rage Against the Machine’s Zack de la Rocha without Chuck D. Not to mention the fusings of rap, rock, heavy metal, and jazz spanning the albums of either artist.

Aside from the lackluster rhymes, which I understand were an innovation in their own right and responsible for the edgier and arguably more creative rhymes of present day, the only complaint I have towards this album regards Flava Flav. I don’t understand his role in Public Enemy. It took half the album before he ever added anything that resembled a rhyme scheme. Instead, he concerns himself mainly with being the designated hype man for Chuck D’s bravado. Maybe, I just don’t understand what a hype man brings to the table at all, other than being an annoyance similar to hearing Funkmaster Flex on every single rap song you illegally downloaded ten years ago. Flava Flav’s only shot at dignified glory comes during “Too Much Posse” when he finally gets his time to shine and pulls it off with a dose of swagger.

All in all, I can respect what Public Enemy and more importantly their debut album did for the blossoming rap and hip-hop art form and community, but again, given the artists we have now, this album is not incredibly listenable. Besides “Sophisticated Bitch,” which I first encountered while watching Jackass, the album does not contain one track that was instantly identifiable or able to get stuck in my head prompting further listens. That being said, due to its innovation and future influence, the album deserves a spot on the list, but not above ZZ Top’s Tres Hombres. The fact that it is I find as ridiculous as Flav’s line of work after Public Enemy.

d.

I really had high expectations and Enemy kinda left me hanging this time. Not a bad CD by any means and certainly ahead of its time. This album really shows why Chuck D was the real draw. Flava Flav serves no purpose here and the beats are generally only decent. Sophisticated Bitch sounds like someone found the track left over from a RunDMC session and told Chuck to go to town.

That’s the real problem for me. You have such a captivating voice spitting verses that still resonate today and you weigh it down with heavy-handed beats and weak scratching. I have almost no complaints from a lyrical perspective aside from a few lines that are pretty dated. But through so much here it really feels like Chuck D is dragging everyone behind him like a Ferrari with the emergency brake on. It really makes some songs drag. After the first three minutes we already knew, your Uzi weighs a ton. Did we need a full five and a half minutes?

Some songs break the mold though. "Timebomb" has a sparse beat, mostly drums and a sweet organ lick. Everything just bounces along so smoothly, a great track. "Too Much Posse" is all drums and Flav and is probably his best performance. I know "911 is a Joke" is a classic, but his actual ability to ride the rhythm was never better than right here.

There’s a lot more disappointment to come though. "Public Enemy No. 1" is just annoying. The phaseshift on the bass is so grating, I found I was actually clenching my jaw the whole time. The repetition of the word ‘one’ on every chorus comes across as lazy and obnoxious. The title track has three 8 bar verses over four minutes and twenty seconds. What’s the point?

I just don’t feel like I listened to a whole cohesive album. No flow from one track to the next at all. There are individual songs that stand out, but even when they line up in the track order the jump from one song to the next is distracting. It’s like the phone ringing mid-lovin’. No matter how good it is, it takes you out of the rhythm. Man, I hate saying this, but I just feel let down by P.E. right now….

-The Fat Man

#498 - ZZ Top - Tres Hombres

Tres Hombres: stands for 3 guys. More specifically, three guys I'd like to get sloshed with at a bar with sawdust on the floor (they don't have those in Ohio, do they?). Another Roadhouse-worthy track; how can you not want to be out with your buddies at a hole-in-the-wall dive bar while listening to this album? Personally, I love the guy in this clip who continues to smash bottles with a vengeance while everyone else is attacking Crazy Swayze. Albums like this are what I'm made of, they are in my breeding. In fact, "La Grange" was a staple of my childhood musical tastes due to my father who raised me with Stevie Ray and ZZ Top. I was the only child in grade school walking through the halls with my TMNT lunchbox singing, "A haw, haw, haw, haw." My sophomore year of high school I had the privilege of seeing ZZ Top in all their old man glory at the venue formerly known as Gund Arena in Cleveland, Ohio back in 1999 and I have to say they still had it. Awe-inspiring blues riffs, kick-ass guitars, and beards I can only hope to grow. I mean who else has microphone stands and guitars made out of car parts? Seriously? Years later, I was 26 and turning the volume up while jamming out to "La Grange" on Guitar Hero with no shame. It's stood the test of time.

While "La Grange" has always been part of my music library, I had not had the pleasure of ever listening to Tres Hombres until a few days ago. My run-in with "La Grange" came from a Greatest Hits album, but I am depressed I had not given Tres a spin many years before. From the beginning riff of "Waitin' For the Bus" to the hillbilly gospel of "Have You Heard," this album is remarkable. Speaking of "Have You Heard," does anyone recognize the beginning riff that appears to have been later ripped off by Journey in "Lovin' Touchin' Squeezin'?"

In between these two bookends, I find myself confused whether I should be drinking beer or praising Jesus and wondering what is wrong with doing both simultaneously. These songs are blues rock hymals meant for knocking back cold Budweisers. I can't even name you a few favorite tracks, because all of them are quality examples of how music should be played. If you twisted my name I would have to settle on "La Grange" (of course), "Shiek," "Beer Drinkers & Hell Raisers," and "Have You Heard?" Since first listening to this album, it has been in constant rotation; that's how good it is. I love its perfect balance of slow and quick tempos. Its driving guitar riffs which seem to be played with the ultimate ease. Its availability to being played during Saturdays spent out in the yard playing cornhole as well as hanging out until 2 a.m. at the seediest of all joints. It shares all the great elements of Albert King's Born Under a Bad Sign while being something gloriously and exquisitely different. This album makes me wish I was born prior to its release just so I could run out and buy the tape or 8-track (whichever) and play it in my car or listen to it at the bar during its initial glory. Buy this album. Just buy it.....and Road House. You will not be disappointed. A great album (and worthy addition to the Top 500) made by tres malos culos. That's Spanish for "three bad asses."

-D. Reed

There’s just too much good here to know where to begin. Very few bands have ever been as tight as ZZ Top, and this is them at their best. Dusty Hill and Frank Beard sound like they’ve been playing together for decades, especially amazing since they were both 23 during recording. That precision rhythm section really shows up on "Precious & Grace," grinding along under a three-tiered guitar solo.

Of course most people know this album for "La Grange." If you don’t like this song, I don’t think we can be friends. Sure it’s a bit of a John Lee Hooker ‘homage’, but I can’t listen to it without craving cheap beer, stale peanuts and a pool cue. Follow that up with "Sheik" and its Santana-ish percussion groove and you can smell the smoke stained walls of thousand western bars. Throw in "Beer Drinkers & Hell Raisers" and you’ll taste enough copper to make you count your teeth.

One thing that shocks me going back to this album is how much Kings of Leon sounds like a young ZZ Top. The vocal comparisons are undeniable, specifically on "Master of Sparks." "Master" is one of my favorite songs here. Musically one of the most impressive tracks, the great storytelling is a huge bonus. I could listen to this one over and over.

Speaking of musical influences, "Hot Blue & Righteous" sounds like a lost Gram Parsons song. I keep expecting to hear Emmylou Harris come in on harmony. Really a very beautiful song, it’s almost something religious. Much credit has to be given to a band that can pull off that change of pace.

Another great on the list, and the first that I think should have been much higher. This is a legitimate top hundred contender, and to be thrown on here so late is a shame. Billy Gibbon’s solos alone deserve a better ranking. Get a good pair of speakers, some Schlitz (maybe some papers if you so choose) and appreciate this album like the Rolling Stone voters should have.

-The Fat Man

#499 - Albert King: Born Under a Bad Sign

When it comes to blues guitarists, Albert King has always been a personal favorite. He’s also often ignored for flashier players, like Stevie Ray Vaughn. I love King’s style, though. Preferring to put more emotion into the individual notes than cramming to many into each bar.
Let me start with my only real problem with this album. At times I think someone involved in the production was trying to update King’s sound. The rhythm guitar on "Change of Pace" playing a straight funk scratch the entire time is awkward. It never diminishes the song, but at times is obvious. When it rides under a hot horn track it fits nicely. Otherwise it seems like a product of the era’s rush to modernize the blues.
"Born Under a Bad Sign" is the obvious standout here. A classic even when sung by Homer Simpson (see Simpsons Sing the Blues), it does what so many great songs do and appeals to everyone. The self centered notion that we’ve had to endure more than the next guy is universal, it’s human nature. Who doesn’t feel like a big legged woman is guiding them to their grave?
There are several perfect tracks on here. "Get Out of My Life Woman" is my go-to for marital strife (kidding hun). "Goodtime Charlie" feels like a Sunday morning comedown. One of the best grooves on the album along with a some great organ really hits you in all the right places. The simply titled "I Got the Blues" has probably my favorite rhythm track, the bass and piano riding the same hilly bounce that makes you nod your head.
The back half is mostly a collection of live songs. This is really where the band gets to step out. "Watermelon Blues" and "Stormy Monday" dominate here. "Watermelon" really lets loose. Pounding drums and blazing horns. Its like watching the end of Blues Brothers. "Stormy Monday" is just an incredible number that needs to be heard.
So on our second review we’ve already found the first album deserving of making the list. There isn’t a bad song in the mix. King’s guitar is spot on, always playing the perfect not for any given moment. He really understood the theory of it not being important which notes you play, but the ones that you don’t. Add a machine of a band behind him and you really can’t go wrong.

-The Fat Man




Albert King, you make me want to find the seediest bar in my hometown and play you on the jukebox all night. This album, along with the next review to come, are essential for dive bar binge drinking. I'm not going to run this album down song-by-song. Instead, I'm going to say that this album, along with album #498, are worthy of a Roadhouse-worthy night of ass kicking, hell-raising, and mourning into your frosted mug of Pabst Blue Ribbon. All I can imagine while listening to this album is hanging out at the Double Deuce, watching some great 80's ladies, and trying not to catch a flying bar stool from one of Brad Wesley's thugs. Now, before you tell me, I'm well aware of the talent of the great Jeff Healey, but can you not agree that the beginning of the afore-included clip does not have a hint of vintage Albert King.

Mr. King has a knack for tugging at your heart strings in a manner that is bold and honest without being overly emotional. Think Dashboard Confessional without Chris Carraba's ability to make fat teenagers cry and scream. Albert King was an innovator and a phenom; a man who paved the way for Stevie Ray Vaughn, Johnny Lang, Kenny Wayne Sheppard, and even John Mayer (before you hate - I'm talking about John Mayer post-Room for Squares.)
Unfortunately, I think Mike and I may have invested in the wrong Albert King album. We may have confused Born Under a Bad Sign with Born Under a Bad Sign and other hits, because we cannot find the track "Goodtime Charlie" on the track listing for the original. This may be a huge error on our part or a historical miscalculation. I would vote for the former, because neither of us claim to be the brightest glow in the dark condom of the batch. Either way, the album we listened to was, in fact, great and worthy of the top 500 whether it was the actual album or not. Sadly, we have yet to locate the original release of Born Under a Bad Sign. Nevertheless, we will do our due diligence and get to the bottom of this, so we don't look like absolute schmucks. Look for a revised entry in the next few days, if we can find the original, as well as more frequent updates now that we both have a great deal of available time.

-D.